A Come-Apart

Yesterday was a terrific day.
Today sucks.

Not every minute of it, but most especially this afternoon, within the last hour.

I'm at such wit's end, I can only type in clipped sentences right now:

Spencer drank last night at Kip's, coming home after another argument.
Kip continually called his cell phone leaving verbal tirades on the voice mail.
Spencer wanted more beer at home since he left it all over at Kip's.
I acquiesced and gave him the debit card and told him he'd have to walk.
I had had a couple beers of my own and wasn't going to drive.
We didn't argue, we had a good evening, drinking and watching Monty Python.

Today, Spencer wanted to go hang out at his brother's house [with more beer].
I took him over there, and went to visit a friend's business open house, in order to give her some moral support.
I did a little shopping, calling Spencer when I was done, to see if he was ready to be picked up from his brother's [it'd been about 4 hours by then].
When I get there, he's not ready, making me wait; my temper already building.
We get home, he gets his drunken ass in the house.
My patience is wearing thin.
He starts digging in my shopping bags, throwing one onto the floor to make himself room on the couch.
That's when I completely fly off the handle. [I think in the South they call it "having a come-apart].
Then Spencer rails at me for flying off at him, and we're yelling, he's throwing groceries, and Baby has run to the other end of the house.
Spencer's hollering at me, calling me a moron.
I'm hollering back that, yes, I am a moron, for putting up with all this.
I was wishing I was dead.
I cried [tears are still coming], but we've calmed down, and even had a bite to eat.
Spencer was still hungry so I put a frozen pizza in for him, thinking if I can get him to eat, I can get him to sleep.
In fact I hear his snores coming from the living room couch right now.
I had to turn to my blog so I could get it off my chest.
I just don't know how I can do this forever.
My temper is short, I've lost my patience, I'm losing my sanity.

And there's still some groceries I can't find, after their flight.

~Pym